Skip to main content

Tumbling Down!

Kolby and I fell asleep on the couch last night watching a movie. She woke up around 1:00 in the morning and wanted to go to her own bed. I got up with her and she took several steps and she just fell over and tumbled flat on the ground. Kolby cried so hard. She said she didn't have any control over her body and she couldn't stop the fall. I felt so bad for her. Her dad even woke up from the sound of the fall. He lifted her up and we helped her into her bed. She cried and cried.

Kolby doesn't like cuddling. If I could I would sleep with her everynight just to make sure she was ok. She tells me that I need her more than she needs me...accompanied with a little giggle. But I cannot help but to want to take care of her....and oh how I wish I could take all this away from her. But instead, she let me tickle her back and arms until she fell asleep. It is heartbreaking watching your child suffer from pain and disease. I just pleaded with my Heavenly Father to take all my guardian angels that watch over me and give them to her. The next morning, which is today, Kolby woke up with another splitting headache. It took everything she had to get ready to go to the doctors for her 2nd chemo treatment and spinal tap. She dry-heaved and cried and cried and cried. When she went to the doctors they weighed her and she weights only 88 pounds. Before she was sick she weighed 105 pounds...and she is 5ft. 4in. tall. But you know what? She is still as beautiful as ever! I love you Kolbsters!

Comments

  1. TaraleeJune 1, 2010 at 9:17 PM

    Oh, I am just so sorry! I think about Kolby SO much and she is in every single prayer of mine. I love this girl! Kolby, you are an amazing girl and I have always ALWAYS thought so!

    I'm so happy that you started this blog. I have been unsure whether calling or stopping by would be a bother so I have opted to just give some space for now. I appreciate that I can get some updates from this blog. I'm rarely on FB so I've been quite out of the loop. Thanks for taking the time to update everyone through this blog. Our prayers are with you!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. KolbyJune 1, 2010 at 10:36 PM

    Taralee, your the first to post a comment. I was so excited! This is great therapy to work on. She will loves this one day. I wish she would write down her feelings, she said she will one day, so I am trying to track this journey for her. I just love ya. And Kolby loves you to. You can stop by anytime you want. We would love to visit with you. Love ya!!! I am glad you like the blog.

    ReplyDelete
  3. TomJune 2, 2010 at 12:30 AM

    We are thinking about and praying for you. We love you guys. Hang in there Kolb's, be strong. Your tender, pure heart inspires me. Please let us know if we can do anything. Anything.

    ReplyDelete
  4. UnknownJune 2, 2010 at 3:55 PM

    I have no words other than I am thinking about you and your family!
    xoxo Natale` Mouer

    ReplyDelete
  5. Kristin ChesnikJune 5, 2010 at 3:35 PM

    I'm totally crying, knowing that I would feel exactly the same way (wanting God to protect my kid even if not me). Kolby, we think the world of you and are so sad for your pain.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

A little note from me, Kolby.

I want thank Kristi and Kylie for designing these T-Shirts. At first I didn't want my name on the shirt. I really do not like having the attention on me. But, after I saw them I really liked them. Thank you Kristi and Kylie. Also, thank you so much Vicki and Dale for making the t-shirts, you did a great job. I just love them. Thank you!!! This has been really hard on me. I wish I felt better and I want my healthy body back. I miss hanging out with my friends and doing the things I like. I also do not like it when I feel sick. The blisters in my throat and mouth are gone right now, but when I take chemo again I know they will come back. It has been nice feeling good these last few days. I haven't had to have chemo this week because of the scans. It is such a good feeling to feel good again. I never really appreciated my healthy body till now. The chemo makes me feel horrible. I have no energy. I feel nauseous all the time and I get horrible headaches. They hurt so bad. I get s...
10 comments
Read more

Keeping Kolby

Kolby’s website was originally named so appropriately by Sarah Barlow, one of our family’s closest friends. I think that more than anything it describes this strong selfish desire we have… not to lose our daughter in this battle with NHL cancer. Today we won another round in that fight. We got some results back from the cancer center today that had a lot of positive in it. Kolby’s new MRI and PET scans indicated that the cancer is on the retreat. Her tumors have reduced in size significantly as seen in the MRI photos, and the cancer cell activity has also dropped significantly. This is a good indication that the chemotherapy treatment is having a positive effect on her bone lesions and tumors. She still has mild patchy areas of disease on her sternum, anterior right first rib, anterior left 5th rib, in her lower vertebrate, and in her pelvic area. These areas still lit up on the PET scan, but the activity was greatly reduced. There was one area on her on her right first rib that has mi...
7 comments
Read more

Father's Day

Today was a great day for our family. Kolby went to church. It was a challenge , but it was really important for Kolby to go to church today with her dad. She got up, got ready and she looked beautiful. I really wish I would have taken pictures of the girls with their dad, but we were in such a hurry to get off to church that I forgot. Next time I will for sure. She was pretty emotional at church. It was a lot for her to get ready and go to church for the first time in a while. She wanted to arrive a few minutes late, and leave a few minutes early. It is really hard for Kolby to see people, only because of all the different emotions she is feeling right now. She gets very emotional when people hug her and express their love and support. She loves it, but right now, she cries every time she has a new visitor or sees people. So, please do not get offended if Kolby is quiet when you see her or visit with her. It's just how she is right now, and that's ok . Everyone deals wit...
18 comments
Read more